My time has come to a close

As I wrap up my time here in Texas, I have a few final thoughts about this unraveling (and that truly has been the operative term here) of my deceased Uncle's estate. First off, what has come to the fore is that my father and I approach this process differently than my cousin. The forefront of our motivation is that we are here to settle the estate of my Uncle. Creditors get paid off, promises kept and laws get followed to the letter. In my mind, and what has caused some tension between myself and my cousin, is that he and his half-sister are here for asset preservation. Each time I declare a check should be written (and remember I can only voice my opinion as I have no legal power to write checks in this instance) I have been reminded that I am "writing a check out of (their) pockets."

I've also been given further proof of the practice of dealing with problems and affairs as they become known. How much of the pain and work that we are dealing with here is a function of my Uncle just not addressing issues right away. Fines and judgments galore here because he simply didn't pay things (or in many cases probably didn't have the funds to pay his bills). Also, how many lawyers could one person need and deal with at the same time?

On a personal front, I have come to realize that we are really products of our fathers and parents. More often than not, how I respond to a situation is pretty much the same way my father answers. I approach things the same way he does. Cut no corners, honor your commitments and say what you mean. I have watched my Dad deal with this really, really stressful and complicated situation with great calm (ok MOST of the time, it's my Dad remember) but his management of people is something I've never actually seen in action before. I've had to rein him in on some tendencies to want to micromanage people, but overall, he's been great. I'm proud of him.

In addition, I've learned how having financial security as a child and throughout life alters the way you approach the world. It's not that money can buy me anything, but its having the ability to not have to shortchange people or to be able to pay in full right up front. The ability to do so makes life a lot easier and more pleasant.

Now that I'm finishing up service to the family, I'm going to fly to New Orleans to spend a week doing relief work in St. Bernard Parish, east of the city. I need to do some physical labor after having sat around here for the last three weeks.