Should I Be Nominated For The Darwin Award?

My optometrist and her assistants chuckle every time they answer the voice and recognize that my voice is on the other end. I am notorious for losing/crushing/breaking my contact lenses. I wear gas permeable (closer to hard than soft) lenses and have since I first got contacts back in the 8th grade. I like them because they are low maintenance in most every respect. However, the tradeoff is that they aren't inexpensive. One lens runs me $85 out of pocket after the two lenses I get each year as part of my insurance package.

Usually, I have to replace a contact because of general carelessness and in a moment of lapsed attention, a contact misses my eyeball and falls into the sink and then gets taken down the drain by the running tap. I've also crushed a lens into bits when trying to get it off the top lid of the case when it has flipped over and sealed itself rim-side onto the plastic case itself.

So, when I called this past week, I know I was going to be the subject of ridicule for having to order this latest contact lens. I had to call this past Saturday after having picked up a new lens the afternoon before. When I got home on Friday evening, I grabbed all my items from the car and walked into my front office. A couple hours later, I was sorting through my papers and books and didn't find my contact lens which was in a contact case. I scoured my office carefully. I went back out the car, no lens. I cased the street between the car and my home. No sign of the contact. Yes, I LOST A CONTACT LENS BEFORE I EVEN MADE IT HOME. So, this afternoon, a week after the infamous "contact lost within 5 hours of purchase", I will have to endure the ridicule from the members of the office of my optometrist. I bet she herself will start in on me as well.